I’ve written this blog post specifically for my family and friends, who don’t know what I’ve been up to recently.
I don’t even know where to begin, I’ve been avoiding writing this blog post for-ever now, well for a few months. As the days creep closer to my one year blog anniversary. I know I have to sit down and just do it.
So here it is, I have a blog and I create and sell things through Etsy.
I guess you could say, I am a blogger/freelancer and an entrepreneur in the works.
And now you know.
I have been living a double life, and its been so thrilling to have this little secret for the past year.
I did something for me, something only I knew about (sort of), something that I worked hard on daily, something that made me proud, and something that made me happy. Its kind of like when you’re pregnant and you start to feel the kicks of your baby. Its new, its wonderful, its amazing and its something only you and your baby share. Its your little secret with your baby, and this blog and my etsy are my babies. My secrets.
Well, not really, some of my close friends and a few family members knew. But, I was very careful to tell anyone. I was so scared of telling anyone the dreams I had of doing this. I mean, I went to college and had an “adult job” the job I dreamed about having since I was in high school (I was a teacher). I’m sure most people expected me to go back in the ‘real world’ work force soon, but it’s not what I wanted to do. My heart wasn’t in teaching anymore. I love the IDEA of teaching, but a lot of people don’t realize the many, many, countless hours that goes into teaching. The times you are away from your family (open houses, after school activities, lesson plans, grading papers, Saturday trainings, summer trainings) was not what I desired for our family.
Living in fear
I lived in fear and shame for so long, I feared of what other people would think of me. I felt ashamed that I had the opportunity to go to college and get my degree, but didn’t want to be a teacher anymore. I feared that others would think I’m out here catching this fluff dream, something intangible and unrealistic. But starting today, I am done living in fear. I’ve had a wonderful support of my husband and a support group of small business moms pushing me along. And now, hopefully all of my friends and family who are now reading this.
I have new dreams, dreams to be able to stay at home, take care of my family AND also to work, but from home. I want the best of both worlds, I want to have my cake and eat it too. I not only declare it, but will work hard daily to continue to make that happen.
So, this is me, leaving fear at the door and chasing my dreams.